I'm sorry.

I have been completely inactive on deviantART for 6 long months. I remember a year ago I was writing updates every other week, little did I know that I would soon be completely inactive. I really don't have any excuses for my inactivity. I have actually visited dA everyday to keep up with my messages and deviations, I just never felt inspired enough to interact. I apologize to everyone that follows me and waits for me to upload something. I also will not promise anything because I may end up inactive again after this journal entry, however I will attempt to keep connected.

The reason I am writing this right now is because of this past weekend. On Friday morning I left for a rally in Chicago with my church. I left very pessimistic about its effect on my life. None the less, I returned with my life changed. I made at least 50 friends there that I already miss dearly. The theme of the weekend was about playing like a child, and trying things you normally wouldn't do. The way the event was set up really made me try new things, which brought me so much joy.

This new found inspiration is what inspired me to write something. And right now I have some ideas flowing in my head for some drawings...but no promises.

Hello again everyone. I feel like I might have to reintroduce myself to a few of you since I've been pretty inactive since January. Most of my followers are just my friends at school, so I don't feel like repeating things that everyone already knows...thats my excuse for being inactive...I know it isn't a good one.

Anyway, yesterday I got my drivers license! It was an experience I've been waiting to do since I've turned 16...back in November. My instructor was the most stereotypical driving instructor ever; his look, his personality, and even his voice. He wasn't very nice, and he acted as if I sucked at driving...so I thought I was going to fail. But he passed me...so I'm happy.

I have also been working on a new drawing. I started it about a month ago, but I just haven't finished it yet. It should be really easy to finish, I don't have much left to do. It's just the fact that I've been too...preoccupied. I want to finish it by next week.

At this very moment I am at school writing this. It is after school, and I'm waiting for my mom to pick me up since she wouldn't let me drive to school today. So I'm waiting to go home, wishing that I could have driven here. My girlfriend (RoxieJane) is also after school, but she is at rehearsals for the spring play. Life has been pretty good to me lately.

*UPDATE*
I'm feeling better, and I think I traced it back to the pizza I was eating at the time...haha!

And Finals are done...and I feel pretty good about them...so that's a relief
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Just thought I'd update my journal that hasn't been updated in a while...I guess I just haven't had much to say lately.

Anyways, I just got the sudden feeling of depression...and I have no idea why. I have never felt overly sad in my life for no reason...so this is odd for me. Today was a pretty good day, despite the finals I had to take. I can't think of any reason as to why I feel this way. There really is no reason.

Hopefully it will pass soon...maybe I'm just going through a typical teenage testosterone change...haha

Hey everyone,

I recently did a rough design of a logo for a friend of mine. I really want this logo to be as professional as possible, so before I go in an do a final version, it would be great if you guys could tell me what you think of it and how I can fix it. I have already gotten advice from professional designers, but I also want some opinions from some artists and friends.

Sorry that this journal is nothing important, but if you could help me out and give me advice that would be great!

Thanks!

10/19/08
We just got back from visiting my cousin. It was really a lot harder to see him like this then I thought it was going to be. He seemed pretty conscious and understanding, he just was slow at responding. Though he was kind of in and out of understanding at times. We saw a picture of him from last week and he looked healthy. When we saw him yesterday he seemed to have deterierated. Its really hard to believe that a month ago he was perfectly fine, the monster hadn't attacked yet.

Anyways, we got news that the tumor has doubled in size, even with 3 doses of radiation. That news did not ease the pain and sadness. It's even harder to know that he is responsive and understanding of whats going on, even though he can't do anything about it. We are going back up to see him on Sunday with some family to celebrate Christmas. We refuse to let the monster ruin that for us.

It's so hard to watch this vicious monster take him over.
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10/17/08
I know I said that I would be drawing a lot more, and that I would hopefully be filling up my devations...but at this point I have other things on my mind. My cousin (my moms nephew who is 44 years old and 6 months younger than my mom) has a brain tumor on the right side of his brain in the middle of the motor skills part of the brain.

At this point things are looking grim, he can't move the left side of his body very well. He is also having a hard time responding to things. The tumor is the size of an egg, and it is in a place where they can't surgically remove it. So they gave him a life expectancy of 3 months to 3 years. That alone is a very sad and scary thought.

Today we found out that his liver began to fail overnight, and that he has been sleeping a lot lately. So we are going to head up to the hospital to see him tomorrow. This all just makes me realize that we all take too much for granted...

Anyways, I'm sorry for my sad post, just wanted to let everyone know whats going on with me.